Too Old

Almost four years ago I was tying on a white belt in the locker room for one of my first few classes. Someone asked if I was the instructor and was quite surprised that I was a brand-new beginner. I’ve lost track of how many times since then people have taken me for an instructor.  Obviously the stereotype is this: everyone who starts martial arts begins when they’re kids, therefore any middle-aged person wearing a gi (uniform) must have been training and teaching for decades. Adults let this stereotype dominate their thinking whenever I invite them to join class.

“Oh, I’m too old,” they say of themselves.

I have to chuckle at this. I was 44 when I started, and often I hear “I’m too old” from adults in their early thirties. I’m very nearly 48 at the time of this writing. Every once in awhile I’ll hear this from someone older than I am but who regularly lifts weights and dances in Zumba. Sometimes I wonder if they are uncomfortable with living proof that their perceptions of age and Karate are inaccurate. I get the feeling that a lot of them are silently asking themselves, “But isn’t she too old to be doing Karate?”

I’m too old to not be doing Karate. I’m too old to not do what I enjoy doing. I’m too old to be wasting years in stagnation, never growing. I’m too old to not be seeking to improve my mind, body, and spirit. I’m too old to forgo chasing dreams. I have the final half of my life ahead of me. I don’t want to waste it. But I am realistic about my limitations.

It is harder now to gain ground than when I was a teenager. I have to fight very hard for even a small improvement in strength and endurance. Even minor injuries take longer to heal nowadays. I’m a little less flexible, but not much less. When faced with a younger opponent it’s obvious I’m not as agile. And yeah, shedding a few pounds would help that. Frankly, none of these limitations are a barrier to my growth. My limitations simply prod me to develop ways to work around them.

Most of the ways I work around my limitations are mental. I have to be patient with myself and set specific, small goals over a longer time in order to improve physical conditioning – and I need to persist in reaching those goals. Injury, while unpleasant, prompts me to think about why it happened and to come up with ways of keeping the rest of my body in shape. Flexibility might or might not improve over time, but as long as I can throw a jodan mawashi gheri (roundhouse kick to the face) I’m happy – I don’t need to post a video on YouTube of myself kicking a can of soda off someone’s head. As far as dealing with younger, more agile opponents goes, there’s a saying:

Old age and treachery will always beat youth and exuberance.
– David Mamet

Frankly, there are a lot of advantages to being “old.” I have a lot of life experience that I bring to the dojo. There are things I grasp intuitively that children struggle to understand. For the most part my kohai (students lower ranked than oneself) take me seriously simply because of my age. Young whippersnappers figure out really quickly that if I can do something and they can’t, they’d better step up their game. I don’t get admonished as much as any given kiddo – but then again it’s easy for me to refrain from picking my nose and bouncing around the room when everyone else is already lined up. The biggest advantage is I deeply appreciate my abilities because I have built my skills in spite of my age.

For the most part the culture I grew up in expected middle-aged women such as myself to already be firmly ensconced in safe hobbies like crocheting. I have nothing against crocheting.  My grandmother’s and my daughter’s crocheting was and is absolutely amazing (and my daughter has won ribbons at the state fair). It’s just that one generally doesn’t get black eyes and broken toes from crocheting. Therefore some think crocheting is “ladylike” and Karate isn’t. Fortunately, the times, they are a changin’ – I can, as a middle-aged matron, join a dojo and be assured that the instructors and students will take me seriously as long as I work hard and am respectful of everyone. Women who trained in previous decades will tell you this hasn’t always been the case. We’ve come a long way, baby. But we still have echoes from the past, and I see it every time I tell a fellow adult woman that yes, you can learn Karate too. I’m not sure this mindset will go away anytime soon.

Karate will be introduced to the Olympic Games in 2020. I’m sure we will see a significant uptick in enrollment of Karate students. However, I predict these will mostly be children whose parents have dreams of seeing their darling wearing an Olympic gold medal. I contend that parents won’t see themselves having fun training alongside their children. My opinion is that there will not be a significant rise in the number of new adult students. I speculate that the Olympics might even reinforce the idea that one must start training as a child, than an adult is already washed out.

I understand how intimidating it is to look at the national and international Karate superstars and compare one’s inexperienced self to them. I know the feelings of inadequacy.  Heck, I even know exactly how scary it is to get into a ring with a superstar who’s won medals in international competitions (and YES, I have had the honor of losing 8 to 1 against such a person in sparring).   Those scary feelings don’t exactly attract adult students who already think of themselves as past their prime.

Don’t get me wrong, I am absolutely thrilled that Karate will debut in the Olympics in a couple of years.  But I believe us karateka should still keep on pointing to all the other great things about Karate in order to attract more adult students. Competition is a big part of what we do, but it’s not the end all and be all of Karate. There are benefits for everyone, including slightly lumpy, middle-aged matrons like me.

That is, after all, what this blog is all about.

Author: Joelle White

I began training in Karate in June of 2014 after a 27 year hiatus.

13 thoughts on “Too Old”

  1. Hello Ms Joelle. Another great article. The old saying : “you’re only as old as you feel” come to mind. I have to think that karate or martial arts in general, can be started at any age. My regret is that I wasn’t able to stick with it. Changing of jobs, to 3rd shift which I’m still at after 14 years, was the main factor. Who knows where I’ve could have gone. But I happy with the time I had there. At least I can say I did that in my life. What I find very funny is how the media, mainly the Hollywood rags, like to publish articles about how some stars still look great after 40, 50, 60 etc. What’s the problem? Do one have to look at a certain way at this or that age? It’s all about how you take care of yourself. Obviously plastic surgery plays a part in most cases and it shows. But why be so surprised when people can age gracefully and naturally. Jealousy maybe??. Anyway the martial art should be no different . Age is just a number. Good luck to all who partake in it, at any age. ✌

    1. Aw, thanks Steve for stopping by and commenting. Third shift is no fun. Let’s hope there’s a shift in your work life soon 🙂

  2. Absolutely agree! I started back in my thirties (nearly 40 now) plus I’m female and fat, but I refuse to allow it to hold me back. I think society has an image that any female karate practitioners are young, slim and very fit (and if you are, I salute you!). For a long while I considered stopping because I do not meet those criteria’s (and I doubt I ever will) but I figure, seeing a fat girl out on the mat might encourage more to join up (it certainly would have helped me when I started!). And you know what, all those who started when I did, the young fit ones, have dropped off and here I still am taking ownership of the mat and my health and well being!
    Plus I look at my sensei (62) and his sensei (nearly 70) and they can both run rings around me, I certainly want to have their level of fitness and joy in life than my mother-in-law who has pretty major mobility issues at the same age. You are never too old for karate!

    1. Hello, Suzy, thank you so much for stopping by and commenting. There are lady karateka out there with all body types 🙂 And yes, it does help for other ladies to see all body types out there on the mats. Keep kicking!

  3. I love your posts. I have been an occasional ‘lurker’ on your site for a while now, but it is time to step up and make a comment. This post in particular hits home for me. I started kung fu in my later 40s, and am still practicing it some 5 years later. I absolutely love it and wonder what took me so long to start.  I have gotten many different reactions from friends and family, from assuming that this is just my mid-life crisis (suggesting that it will pass soon), or that I am only doing it to be ‘close to my kids’ (a nice side benefit, but not my main motivation) and also as just a fun way to ‘stay in shape’ (also true, but I have grown to love all aspects of it, not just the fitness aspect). It is often hard for some to just acknowledge that I am a martial artist, even at my age. I guess it has taken me a while to admit that also. This all reminds me of a fortune cookie that I saw recently: “No one is too old to learn, but many people keep putting it off anyway.”

    1. Well hello there, June! I’m so glad you stopped by and commented. I would enjoy a little cross-training in Kung Fu someday – so many arts, so little time! I completely relate to the friends and family thing, LOL. And yes, some find it hard to take me, a slightly lumpy middle-aged matron, seriously. One of the things I do to make sure the college kids know that they should take me seriously is I practice forms as they’re coming in on the first day of the quarter 😉

      1. Thanks for the nice welcome. That is a good idea to show the younger people what you can do from the beginning. I also relate to the desire to cross train! So true about such little time….

      2. Aww, you’re welcome – and thanks for the kind words. Good to “see” you 🙂

  4. Thanks for the nice welcome. That is a good idea to show the younger people what you can do from the beginning. I also relate to the desire to cross train! So true about such little time….

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