I hear you saying, “What, me sign up for martial arts lessons? No way!” I see your never-ending “to do” list and your full calendar. Hey, I know how rough it is to have at least two kids in diapers – been there, done that, got the T-shirt with the spit-up and who-knows-what-else stains. Here’s the thing – you don’t have to be a national champion and you don’t have to burn through all the ranks in one year or even three. That can wait until your kids are older. Your body and your mind can’t wait. They need activity so go ahead and leave the laundry and the running noses. All that will still be there when you get back from class. Just be sure to give Dad his getaway time too. Believe me, your children would rather have you sane than irritable and snappish. And yes, I do know what it’s like to start a martial art as a slightly lumpy, middle aged, and out of shape mother of teenagers. And if your kids are in martial arts class, why not join them instead of sitting there playing with your phone waiting for them to finish?
Here’s 8 reasons why Mom should practice martial arts…
8) Adult students are rare and usually a very welcome addition to the class. Don’t get me wrong, teaching kids is rewarding. But speaking as someone who helps out with newbies and lower-ranked students, I enjoy helping a variety of ages. And it’s kinda hard for an instructor to get experience teaching a variety of ages if all the students are children. Kids benefit a lot from training alongside adults. For the most part adults model appropriate behavior and that helps an instructor no end. Kids who are more senior in rank get a kick out of helping and working with adults. I had the pleasure of teaching new adult students when I was a teenager and now I treasure the youngsters who outrank me! An adult who treats a child with respect is a blessing if that child doesn’t fit in well with his or her peer group at school. You are needed.
7) With a huge variety to choose from, more likely than not there’s a martial art out there that will fit you. It’s not my place to say what the best martial art for you is. Do some research, try a few free lessons. If you find an art and a school that clicks with you, you will learn your lessons better and you’ll be more likely to stick with it. You need to look forward to your lessons. If the classes are a drag try a different school or art. You should be having fun, and yes, you should feel like whatever martial art you choose is the best in the world 🙂
6) You can practice a martial art with your children. Say what? Yes, it can be done. But during class you have to let the instructor do the parenting, especially in a traditional karate dojo (school) where there is a hierarchy of authority. Starting together means you can practice the same things at home. If you start after your child, let your child help you at home – the role reversal can be delightful for both you and your child. Don’t be surprised, though, if you outlast your child and your child moves on to other things while you continue with your martial art. This is very common and means nothing more than your child is forging his or her own identity.
5) Martial arts are more than just a workout. There’s problems to solve, like how to escape an arm bar or how to string techniques together. You’ll have goals to reach – for instance earning the next belt or refining a form. Not to mention you’ll hang out with a diverse group of some really great people. Every mother needs exercise, mental stimulation, accomplishments of her own, and some time to interact with adults. Martial arts are a time-efficient way of gathering these benefits and more. One hour of Karate class time to me equals three hours of other activities – like, say, reading a book, hanging out with friends, and jogging.
4) Adults reap the same benefits as children! Read any article out there on how martial arts are good for kids and put yourself into the article. Are there areas of your life where you could use a bit more self discipline? Do you want to be a great role model for your children? The discipline of practicing a martial art benefits mind, body and spirit and keeps one from stagnating.
3) You will age more gracefully if you keep up your martial arts studies for as long as possible. Look up some of the more “seasoned” warriors and you’ll see what I mean. Along with the rest of the body martial arts work out your vestibular system (responsible for maintaining your balance) and your core muscles. You will be less prone to falling and most likely your back will stay straight. You can’t stop the inevitable but studies show that you can slow it. Your continued good health puts less of a burden on your children. I helped my mother with my grandparents, so I know what I’m talking about.
2) Middle-aged lady hormonal changes are the worst and they usually hit at a time when you need to be the best parent you can be. At perimenopause us women turn into freaky wild-eyed hags, our periods are hell, and at the same time… cough, cough… um… To put it delicately I have a lot more sympathy for young men than I‘ve ever had in my life. Exercise helps all that on a physical level, but there’s more. It’s true that karate has been an outlet for my inner harpy but it’s also given me the mental discipline to overcome the emotional/hormonal weirdness when it wafts through my psyche. My husband and nearly-grown children don’t mind my Karate-related absences. They know I’ll be easier to live with in between classes.
1) You are your children’s body guard. Most women know this instinctively. Awareness, instinct, and adrenaline count for a lot, but wouldn’t it be nice to have more tools to use in a crisis situation? Do you know exactly where and how to hit someone who is grabbing your child? Do you really have time to dig around in your diaper bag for the mace and is your child in the line of fire? It’s easy for me to be an armchair quarterback and to say I would do this or do that, but I do know that I’ve had training in shattering joints and a smattering of training fighting off more than one attacker and in cooperating with others to take someone down. I have tools pounded into my muscle memory – and that is what martial arts training gives you. Hours of sweating and drilling turn into something your body can do automatically if needed. I hope I never have to use these tools to save one of my kiddos, but it’s good to know that I have them.
Still not convinced? Read more articles on my blog and see what I’ve gained. I re-started Karate at the age of 44 knowing full well what I’d be getting into because I’d studied as a teen. I wish I’d started sooner. Don’t make the mistake of thinking you’re too busy, too out of shape, too old, too this, too that. Just join your children in their class or find a martial art that fits you and start. It’s a lot of fun.
This post was inspired by a mix of happenstances. After a woman in his community was raped, Greg Sommers-Herivel offered a month of free Karate instruction to local women. I knew many women would not take him up on his generous offer because they feel like mothering would get in the way. Then “Super” Dan Anderson shared this rather good article on Facebook, “7 Reasons Why Your Child Should Practice Martial Arts“by Eric C Stevens. A mother commented on how much benefit her son was getting from his martial art and I replied, “And now for 7 Reasons Why Mom Should Practice Martial Arts.” Roseanne Mussar saw the comment I’d left and suggested I write this article. Thank you, everyone!